"As I think about your schedules and the pressures you face...in your lives, I can understand why scripture study can so easily be neglected. You have many demands pulling at you....But I plead with you to make time for immersing yourselves in the scriptures. Couple scripture study with your prayers...Privately studying, pondering, and communicating with your Heavenly Father can make an amazing difference in your lives. It will give increased success in your daily activities. It will bring increased alertness to your minds. It will give you comfort and rock-steady assurance when the storms of life descend upon you."
-Elder M. Russel Ballard
I know that prayer and scripture study alone can do nothing to change the fact that I have a chemical imbalance in my brain that causes me to be depressed and highly anxious sometimes. But, as I have found time and time again, doing these things on a regular basis can HELP make things just a bit more bearable when I am "off kilter". I need all the help I can get (love this picture of the protective angels).
So why do I find it so unbearable to do sometimes? It's not because I don't want to be in communication with my Heavenly Father and not because I don't want to be uplifted by immersing myself in His word, but just because I don't want to do anything that takes effort (including bathing and brushing my teeth....my poor husband).
But it's not just that. It's also that I can't FEEL anything in those times (at least nothing but anger) and because I can't FEEL the spirit, or FEEL the Lords love for me, or FEEL the difference it is making in my life, then why make the effort, right?
I go through this EVERY TIME I hit a low spot. EVERY TIME. You'd think I'd have learned by now. Silly me.
The truth is that, no matter what we are/are not feeling, the spirit is ALWAYS there when we are making the effort to communicate with the Lord and get to know Him better (through his word). The Lord loves us more than we can even fathom, even if we can't FEEL it on a constant basis (ask Him to confirm it for you...He undoubtedly will). And, doing these things DOES make a difference. It really DOES!
So don't loose HOPE.
Make an effort to try to follow Elder Ballard's wise counsel (I'm working on it too). Don't give up. Have faith that even though you may not be "feelin' it", that it IS, indeed, helping. And just keep at it.
P.S. I love to hear from you!
Leave a comment or e-mail me at melaniesmethodicalmusings at gmail dot com